a Turnip about the Wind

I was in a play for a class. apparently they were plays by Becket. There were three and the one I was in involved caging a bird, who was a character. I think he was trying to save someone– like a princess or something. Jamie, Noel, Derek, Rob, and Juna were also members of the class and involved in the plays. I sat by Noel after my play was over and I was disappointed, because I couldn't move the chair.
I ended up hanging out with Rob and cuddling with him. Then I was with Eric and cuddling with him. (My subconscious is a whore) Eric called me "dark and interesting" and laughed. He apologized for laughing, but compared me to Clemidiaus's daughter. Clemidiaus was apparently someone in classic lit. However, Eric didn't know who he was so we decided that he was probably some sort of scientist. I was reading Eric's shirt which had some scientific-like things on it. I think I decided he must be some sort of biologist- chemic- alchemist. There was also things on his shirt as to what to do if you get hurt like x lead to exit. Exit was death, like exiting this world.
Now, I ended up at my house with Alex. He had bought one of those Droid phones. He asked me to plug it in for him, I did. (I don't know why.) It had like what I image scorpionflies' genitalia clips look like, but all technology and spiny. He had a remote for the Droid. It sprouted legs and walked over to him. There he goes spending his money on useless tech.
But in my flirtatious attitude, which was perfectly acceptable, I missed the other two plays. Derek was dressed in a weird fancy outfit for one of them. I found him standing on the stage, he was holding something, like a skull. He turned to me "as your," He paused trying to think of the word "Godmother," Godmother?? I thought he was my husband-in-law? "as your godmother, I have a turnip about the wind."
Juna looked up "a turnip?"
"yes."
Then it turns out all the guys I was flirting with wanted to be my boyfriend. I wanted Derek to explain to them that since he was my husband-in-law that he knew who I love.